Meditation for Mental Health

Life

Hi guys!

So this week I’m talking about meditation. It is a form of self regulation that means you clear the mind of thoughts and reach a state of consciousness that means you are at peace! For sufferers of anxiety and depression, it really can help. Once you clear your mind, you can get a focus on whats important in life.

It is very difficult to do, and I still find it difficult. I choose to do it by myself, not in a group setting, as most things like exercise I prefer to do on my own. I use a free app called Headspace, and it really helps! Andy Puddicombe talks you through ten free sessions and then you have the option to buy more. I get by with the free ten, and it only takes ten minutes. Some day I’m so anxious my minds all over the place. Some days I’m super in the zone.

The important thing is that it must be an everyday thing, and is as important as your daily exercise. It is  a legitimate form of therapy and exercise for the mind. I really recommend it, there are other apps out there too if this one doesn’t suit, and of course there are classes out there too! Give it a shot for a week, and tell me if you continue, and what you think!

T xx

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Getting Your Mind Right

Life

Hi team.

So I did promise a mental health blog and here.it.is (said in announcer voice).

In order for you to feel confident in any fashion you choose, you need to be confident in yourself to begin with. For years and years I used outlandish fashion to cover the fact that I was depressed and had major social anxiety. Clothing gave me that outlet to express what I  wanted to be all the way through. Now having been treated and come out the other side (although taking it day by day) I can now wear whatever I want and it not be an expression of something else.

I also used shopping as an outlet to get a high and to feel like I have transformed myself. The sad truth is that this only lasts for a hot minute and you are back to before. Therefore I have a lot of clothing now and a lot of it was from that time. The only way to know your style is once you have a clear head and don’t impulse buy. Here are some tips to get your mojo back (fashion mojo y’all)

  1. Talk to someone – anonymous. Talking to friends is good but with a stranger you can open up in a way that you never thought. They will be able to tell you what your triggers are and offer support and solutions. I went to see someone in Birmingham and got the tools to get cognitive therapy which I still use today (as I was very anti pill at the time)
  2. Pamper yourself. In other words… (Treat YOSELF). I for for massages, pedicures, hair appointments, etc. Take care of your body and it will help you.
  3. Exercise. They say 20 minutes a day is sufficient but I can only run for ten minutes and feel like I’m dying. Pick a sport and do it. Join a team. I run, do pilates, and Zumba, and avoid competitive sports as I get anxiety and competitive. You need to pick whats right for you and do it as much as possible.
  4. Take up a hobby. I read tarot and do black and white photography. I also have learned British Sign Language and Maori. I am endlessly full of hobbies and not enough time, but I try to get all of them done regularly. Do something just for you and you will feel a sense of achievement.
  5. Meditate. I have just started it but it is super good to clean your mind after a rushed and busy day. It means you get a clear focus on what is important and what is not. I am a huge fan as I overthink like hell.

The last one, is declutter your wardrobe. It really declutters your mind. If you want help, I am here to help! Plus, mention this blog and I will give you mates rates.

Try one, and let me know how you get in in the comments!

T xx

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Sorting Your S*** Out

Life

So ladies.

Are you where you want to be? Now this isn’t a blog about career advice (you can find those on the blog), but how to set yourself up to take care of yourself.

So without further ado, here is a list of stuff I did to help my confidence in myself!

  1. Get your nails done.
    Now I don’t mean go all the time, or getting those crazy long nails that crazy people get and somehow live with. I mean go get them buffed, oiled, and painted. Then you can do this at home! Get some moisturiser that has no perfumes (Simple’s range is good) slather some on, put on some gloves and sit there sipping  Prosecco for an hour watching your stories.
  2. Get a Pedicure.
    I went to a place where they did the paraffin wax thing on your feet – so good! They also did my nails and made sure my feet transformed from troll feet to lady troll feet. It was magical. At home, get the same cream as above, pop on your feet and pop some cotton socks on and see the results for yourself (infomercial voice)
  3. Get your eyebrows done.
    I am so glad that I did not pluck my eyebrows into oblivion. Thank you for bringing my bushly eyebrows back into fashion. However everyone needs to get their eyebrows plucked and shaped. Why? It will make you look so good! I had a friend that got hers tattooed on. Now I’m a baby to even think of that but you can see that they are important to some people. If you have small eyebrows get on the internet and see how others made theirs into things of beauty.
  4. Transform your wardrobe as done in this blog and watch your wardrobe come to life!
  5. Drink water, eat fruit and veggies, run, dance, get out of the house. This will make you look  great and glowing.
  6. Dentist and doctor appointments every six months. Get to a dental hygienist too, they clean your teeth super good.
  7. As my girl Cher in Clueless says, read a good book now and then. Reading really makes you relax and when the stresses of the working week get to you, a chapter or two of a good book can work wonders for your mental health. Unless you are reading IT. Eeeeek
  8. Get your hair chopped every three months. Then you can pretend you are in those Pantene commercials. *flips hair*
  9. Facemask yourself at least once a week. If you live in a city, all kinds of crap gets into your face and makes you look old and tired. Get a good charcoal mask on and sip a glass of wine.
  10. Laughter is the best medicine. It really is true! Makes you glow, get pink cheeks, and makes the boys come to your yard. Or Milkshakes. Ahem.

T xx

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Fitnasss Part 2.

Hobbies, Life, Mental Health
Hi guys! So I haven’t done a fitness blog in awhile – so I thought I would give you an update! Fitness is hard guys. Last winter I decided to try work out over wintertime so by Summer I would be on a good fitness level! This did not happen. I comfort ate and stayed inside watching Netflix. My goal in life is to be fit. I have an Apple body shape so I will always have a bigger half (hi boobs) and great legs. I embrace it fully as my mum is the same shape and is a very pretty lady (hi mum). I like to feel strong and fit – this is the only reason I do exercise. I don’t care about weight, I don’t care about crash diets. I believe that as long as you eat lots of veges and try to avoid sugar as much as possible, you can have a healthy happy body. Plus I used to tell customers to cut off the size tags in their clothes as no one will ever care what size you are, they care about YOU. So what’s my plan this winter? Running, Dancing, and Yoga. I like to run as I put some metal on, run for 10 minutes (that’s all I can do) and get endorphins. It’s a great way to release energy and feel like my body is alive! Dancing is something I have done since I was a teenager, and it continues to be the number one thing to help me through my anxiety and depression. I’ll download a cool song and jam out to my music library for twenty minutes. Yoga has been a lifesaver. I am pretty flexible anyway but Yoga has helped counteract any ageing that my muscles have done. I also have terrible posture so this stretches me out and builds my core so I have great posture! What’s your go to for fitness? Comment below! T xx Read my other blogs! Brand Profile: Lisa Junius Letting Go Of Friends. How To Make Friends Follow me on Social Media! Facebook Twitter Instagram Pinterest  

My Perfect Weekend

Life

Hi guys!

So as a lot of you know, I used to work in retail for about 13 years. Retail is a tough industry as the weekend is king in sales and often you have to work at least one of those days, if not the full weekend. If you were a store manager like myself, it would be every weekend, meaning you were effectively chained to the store. I missed out on a lot of events, and even couldn’t relax on my days off as I often didn’t get two together.

Now that I have moved into a different career, I am still trying to get used to having weekends. It sounds really weird, but for the first few months I would wake up on a Saturday and stress about how I had to be at work, and then realise that I didn’t have to be anywhere. The best thing is that my anxiety is really subdued down as I now have two days to do whatever I like and get a proper weekend. I’ve gotten to the point that I now get very precious about my weekends, and if I get a weekend that I don’t have to do anything, I proceed to my perfect weekend.

So for this blog, I thought I would talk about my perfect weekend!

Saturday AM

I turn off my alarm the night before, and sleep in to catch up on sleep. This is great as I have very busy weeks and often need to catch up on sleep! Usually I will chill out playing games on my phone until I know I need to get up, usually between 9 and 10.

Me and my husband will make a cooked breakfast. I will cook, and he will make the coffee. This is a great start to the day and ensures we are both up and ready for whatever we have planned for the day.

I usually start catching up on housework on a Saturday as I try to do it during the week but often I don’t get to it with everything else going on. This includes getting out in my garden – weeding, mowing my lawn, and taking care of my rose bushes. I often have to condense this but I feel so much better once I have done this particular job as I do love gardening and am learning more each year.

Lunchtime! Usually we would have taken a wander to the supermarket and gotten stuff for lunch, and sit and watch something on Netflix, or if its sunny and warm, sit out in the garden on our picnic bench. We usually discuss what else we are up to that day as we are often both working through our to do lists.

Saturday PM

In the afternoon, I usually take some time to relax a bit and play my games, as I am a whirlwind in the morning getting stuff done. Then we might go for a walk, around the streets by our home, and pop into the second hand furniture shop on the way home, as we are always on the hunt for odd bits for our home.

After this, I start probably working working on more intellectual stuff, like writing my blog, photographing content for my Instagram, writing and clearing my emails.

Usually at any given point in the weekend we might have made plans with friends so that will obviously affect whatever we are doing!

Sunday AM – PM

Since I had a big sleep in on Saturday (and obviously if I haven’t been out the night before I will get up and get on with my never ending list. I have a huge list that is always in action so I try to get as much of it done on my days off. I also work on some of my hobbies, such as looking for new projects on Pinterest, compiling my Fashion Scrapbook, reading, and making new playlists for the week ahead. I also get myself ready for the week ahead and figure out what my plans are.

It’s hard being self employed sometimes as you are at the mercy of your email and am always tempted to work. However weekends have become very sacred to me and I make sure I have the right balance of work and play as I do tend to get bored!

What’s your favourite weekend plans?

T xx

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Hustle Porn is a crock of s***

Life, Mental Health

So as we come to the end of another year, we all start looking at New Years resolutions and goals that we so energetically said we would achieve by the end of the year. Often these either roll around to the next year or we ashamedly block the goal out, never to return.

Mental health comes into this quite a bit. It can be an endless cycle of feeling guilty, feeling productive, and achieving. I have endless lists, that I know will go on as long as I live. There is an interesting amount of hustle porn going around at the moment. What is hustle porn? Think of the sayings “Beyonce and the Dalai Lama have 24 hours in a day and so do you.” While that might be true, both of these people won’t have the average person’s pressures. We have families, friends, debts, lists, housework and self care to catch up on.

I burn out quickly if I don’t watch out. I feel the pressure to get loads done all the time. I have Asana to help me plan and remember everything (try it, its very good) and it means that I know what I’m doing each day.

However I have taken a new approach to my goals and jobs, in that I pick what I feel like doing. If I don’t feel like cleaning the kitchen, I wont. I might organise paperwork instead, or write my blog, or practise french. This is still something that needs to be done but I can do it at my own pace.

Big goals such as getting my license, getting a dog, or getting my citizenship are all jobs I’ve had for years. It’s something that has been very frustrating when I don’t get them done year after year, and this year I gave myself a year to achieve them. Guess what your girl is doing in November? Lol.

I now have pushed back getting a dog as my house isn’t ready, and practically that really is the best thing, no guilt associated. I have filled in my citizenship form over a few months, chipping away at it rather than go at it in a sitting. I have taken a refresher lesson and booked my test for 6 – 8 weeks away, but this can be moved.

The point is your goals should just become a part of your life. You can chip away it, but not rush it. And if you don’t meet goals, shove it back. Take the time to do it right straight away.

Hustle porn is something that is very damaging to people with tough mental health issues and shouldn’t even be the lifestyle of normal people. Yes, you can get a lot done, but more jobs will be waiting for you the next day. The main thing is to snatch moments of rest and awareness of the world around you. Pace yourself and remember that life shouldn’t be serious all the time.

Have you fallen victim to the Hustle Porn phenomenon?

Let me know in the comments!

T xx

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Goals for Christmas

Christmas, Life, Mental Health

Hi guys!

So this is a little bunch of goals for me to make sure Christmas isn’t touch. It can be a very triggering time of year, as my family are on the other side of the world, and while I have my husbands family who look after me at Christmas, that mixed with working in retail over Christmas always ensured I was stressed. This year, as I am not working over Boxing Day (YAY) I want to make sure that I am looking after myself and having fun!

  1. Put Christmas songs on the 1st of December. I used to purchase one new Christmas album each year and have Christmas songs playing consistently over the month. This year I will definitely do that, and also decorate my house absurdly early with a fresh Christmas tree.
  2. I will make sure I soak up all the events leading up to Christmas – the Christmas Fair, Ice Skating, and hot chocolates. I will also have my first Christmas do with my new workmates and am looking forward to that very much!
  3. Enjoy the day and be mindful of everything. So often I have been very anxious about what happens the day after (work) that I don’t enjoy the actual day. Plus it can be a lot for an introvert, there is a lot of people, it can be very loud and crazy (which is obviously fine) but I will try and get out for a walk to clear my head and recharge at some point.
  4. Enjoy the process of writing cards and shopping for presents. In the last couple of years its been so busy that its been relocated to a chore, instead of something I look forward to every year. I have around 30 people on my christmas card list, and then presents for a special few, so there is a lot of work to do but I love doing it. However even writing out the cards the last few years has been stressful – not from the work itself but because I have been stressed with work etc.
  5. Sleep in on Boxing Day and then spend all day in my jimjams. I rarely get a Boxing Day off, and now that I have them, I am intending to go crazy. Shop online, eat loads, and watch movies. Can’t wait!

Do you have any Christmas goals? Perhaps something you would like to enjoy more this year? Let me know in the comments! Merry Christmas to you all xx

T xx

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Goals For Winter

Life

Hi guys!

So now that we are fully into Wintertime, I wanted to look at my goals for the next three months! Its really good doing goals and setting a 3 month timer on them as it really gets my butt into gear!

  1. Enforce the winter fitness training  program that I was meant to undertake last winter and get fitter in time for summer! This isn’t about getting a ‘bikini body’ – just making sure I am fit and healthy to enjoy summer!
  2. Make sure I eat healthier during the winter months. I ate very badly last winter – not that there is anything wrong with that but I definitely wasn’t getting all the nutrients I needed! So lots of veges are going to be consumed!
  3. Make sure the cold weather doesn’t deter me from going out and spending time with friends! It can be very easy to just stay put in the warmth of my own house but there is also something nice about coming into a nice warm pub out of the cold.
  4. Take care of my house and make sure we are progressing forward with our house renovations! This is the perfect season to get lots of stuff done indoors and transform it into a homely home.
  5. Self care – its important to get this sorted in the winter months so it doesn’t become all about doom and gloom. Lots of hot baths, pampering, good books, and hot cups of coffee. This will all help in maintaining a positive outlook in the depth of winter!

What are your winter goals? Let me know in the comments!

T xx

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Letting Go Of Friends.

Life

Hi guys!

So this blog deals with a topic that can be quite painful for a lot of people, and in fact has happened to everyone. It is about the ways we lose, let go, or fall out with friends.

The first time you may lose a friend is if your friend moves away. I moved away from my best friend to the UK and it’s been hard. However it’s only strengthened our friendship but I know for a lot of people it can break friendships. There are friends I am no longer as close to simply by being in a different country. It can be very hard to accept, however when I visit it means I can visit the ride or dies.

The other way you can lose a friend is simply growing up. This can often start from puberty onwards as you discover boys/girls and where you are in the world. Its something that does naturally happen, and will continue to happen as you move through high school and get to know yourself and who you want as a friend through a tough time of growing up.

The other time is when people get married and have children. You might not lose them as a friend, but if you aren’t having kids around the same time or indeed ever – because  their lives are now filled with their kids it can be hard for them to see you and vice versa.

The other more in your face way is if you have an actual fight and never make up. This is very painful, as you feel like you are throwing years of friendship down the drain. It can be very hard to come to terms with – people have likened it to a break up. This one can do a bit a of damage and also make you lose mutual friends in the bargain.

Losing friends can be painful, sad, needed, and fine – and all at the same time sometimes. Sometimes you have a toxic friend who doesn’t care about you, just themselves, and this is when you need to let them go. As I’ve gotten older I’ve realised it’s not about the quantity of friends, its the quality. I now have some very close knit friends who we’ve been through weddings, divorces, children, and death. These friends have supported me through my depression, and I have supported them. I have lost a lot of friends to help this happen, but its the greatest payoff as I know who my friends will be until the end of time.

I hope that if you lose a friend, you will gain one more that will enrich your life better than the last!

T xx

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How To Make Friends

Life

Hi guys!

So this weeks topic is all about making friends. Making friends is tough at any age. You may live in a big city full of people and feel a little lonely. It can be hard to break into groups who are fully established and have their own routine.

However there are many avenues you can try.

  1. If you have a partner, see what their friends are like. Who are your mutual friends? Who are friends of friends that sometimes come to events and you don’t see much? If you think you might get along with someone, talk to them at your next meeting, and then arrange to go out for coffee!
  2. Join a club doing something you enjoy. The gym, knitting group, walks around your town or city, or even volunteer at a charity shop! If you enjoy doing something, you will find people who will enjoy it too, and there is your first thing in common.
  3. Get to know people online. I have some Twitter friends that I have now become friends with in real life, which is amazing! You can chat over social media and then meet up for a drink or a coffee and see how you mesh – and the best part is it really is just continuing the conversation!
  4. Join Facebook Groups! I have joined a few for work and for personal and it really feels like a little group all bonded over one or several topics – plus if they are in your town or city thats even better!
  5. Work friends – now this one is a little trickier as you might have to also make sure work doesn’t interfere with your budding friendship but you may spend 40 hours with the people you work with – why not go out for an afterwork drink with some of them? This will help you at work also, and means that your work life can be a fun place to be for the days that you are there. Plus you might be friends with them outside of work which can be really fufiling.

Are there any tips I am missing? Let me know in the comments!

T xx

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